"Episode Two Of 'Who Wants To Be A Superhero' Was A Real Shocker and Eye-Opener"
by Captain Biorhythm
Who would have imagined that Iron Enforcer was a secret "Super Villain." The subtle clues were there for everyone to see from the very beginning. I could not believe he would last very long as a contestant, because everything he did from the beginning was the anti-thesis of a real superhero. He did not succeed at any of the superhero tests...failed miserably over and over again.
When asked, "Would it kill you to use some antiperspirant?" his response was in sync with his evil personality. He said he doesn't care what the others think of him...so long as he wins. He feels superior to the other contestants and even called them "pinheads."
When Iron Enforcer was asked about his possible steroid use he said, "It's O.K. to use them to accomplish ‘something positive.'" He is obviously filled with self-destructive pride that seeks self-glorification at any cost. Pride seems to be the major mistake that has caused most of the major crimes and human suffering from the beginning of time...supernatural and human.
I wonder if he will be thrilled when he gets cancer or some weird disease because of a mega hormone imbalance. He believes he has the best body of all the contestants and does not want to make friends - just win!
In the dog test, Iron Enforcer, gave up unexpectedly one step from door…for no particular reason. He ridiculed Creature about laughing and not making her goal. He said he wants to be known for his spiritual qualities. I wonder if that is the "Devil incarnate?"
Creature was asked when she last washed her hair. She said her superpowers are stored in her hair. She feels "empty and powerless" when she washes it. I wonder how long someone can go with unwashed hair before it becomes a nest for evil insects. She also failed the human-dog tug of war and laughed every step of way. She explained that, "Fear brings out her laughter."
Fat Momma and Major Victory, the former male stripper, were asked if their characters were good role models for young people. They both were offended by the question. Both believe that it is your attitude and your desire to help others that is important.
Major Victory said he hoped kids realize stripping "is wrong." Major Victory did blow everyone away when he carried both dogs, one on each arm, to the door. He had the quickest time.
TyVeculus's was tested when he received a new superhero costume that was not what he expected. TyVeculus did not like it, but he told Stan he did. The new costume did look like a character from "The Warriors of Plasm" comic book series that was popular around 1993 from "Defiant" Comics Company. TyVeculus actually cut the feathers off his hat after Feedback ridiculed him.
TyVeculus was embarrassed when almost all of the other superheroes laughed at him.. When he went back to meet with Stan, to tell the truth, he was embarrassed at his dishonesty. TyVeculus worried that Stan would eliminate him because he did not like costume and lied directly to Stan's face.
After his meeting, Stan allowed him to wear his original costume.
TyVeculus did shine when he faced the dogs. He had no problem fighting his way to the back door, dragging the dogs with him. He said it was easy for him because he faces danger on a daily basis as firefighter.
The dogs overpowered Lemuria, Cell Phone Girl, Fat Momma, Creature and Iron Enforcer.
Lemuria was dragged back to where she began. Stan said that in times of crisis it is important to have a strategy.
Cell Phone girl said she had a horrible headache and lasted 4 seconds. I think she quit so early because she suffered a major dog bit when she was younger. The fear of being bitten by a dog can be terrifying...two dogs even more so. Stan asked her that if she has a headache, is that a good enough excuse to not do what needs to be done? In light of her previous dog bite, this may have been a little harsh, even though she had run out of “cell phone minutes.”
Fat Momma failed to distract the dogs by tempting them with donuts. After she surrendered, the dogs eat the donuts anyway.
Monkey girl wanted to make Stan proud. She blew everyone's minds when she would not give up until she made it all the way to door. It took her over 9 minutes of battling hard-biting dogs. It was truly a courageous performance.
Feedback was chastised because he ridiculed Ty'Veculus's new costume. He said the helmet looked like it was a fan...Stan's biggest fan. Ty actually cut the feathers off the helmet. Stan told him, "Heroes do not make people feel worse."
It will be interesting to see how miserable "Dark Enforcer" makes everyone else. It appears he has found his true calling as a Supervillian.