"Part 9: Read the Transcript of Mike Filsaime's In Search Of Heroes Interview" by Ralph Zuranski
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Ralph Zuranski: Do you readily forgive those who upset, offend and oppose
you?
Mike Filsaime: I am so forgiving to a fault. I think that’s the Scorpio nature in me. I was born October 26. I almost go into everything that I do with the expectation that I’m going to do everything I can right. I hope this person does too but if they don’t then so be it.
I try not to hold a grudge. I’ll kick and scream sometimes and say “Oh man I can’t believe this guy did this to me.” But you have to get over it. If you are going to dwell on the negative things and in the past think instead of what you could be doing if you are working on a project and moving something forward.
I’ve been burned so many times. I could basically tell you on a weekly basis how I get burned. But look where I am in my life because I let it go.
I say “Ok you know if that happened and this & that got shut down or this person did this & that then I hope in my heart this person changes their ways so they can be a better person. Because if they don’t they’ll only have bad things happen to them.”
I don’t wish that upon them. There was a person recently that we didn’t get along with each other in Butterfly Marketing. Remember I said you may have fire your bad friends, well this guy wasn’t behaving. I had to fire him as a customer and refund him.
So he now is going around in forums and tongue & cheek beating me up a little bit. I’m not going to play down to that game. I sent him a very polite email and apologized that we got off on the wrong foot.
I said “We can do better things in this world if we both put positive energy out there. I give you my word I’ll never say anything bad about you regardless of what you continue to do to me.
However, maybe one day we’ll meet and let’s not have any uncomfortable feelings when that happens. I always believed that if you don’t have anything nice to say about people then don’t say anything. And right there, do I have faults with that? I’m sure I do.
I’m sure there are times I may have a cup of coffee or a drink with somebody and a topic will come up and I’ll probably talk in ways that I shouldn’t about somebody. But publicly you should never do anything like that. Without a doubt you have to be able to forgive people and forgive yourself.
You have to know when you’ve made faults. You have to say I’m sorry and apologize to people and reach out to them before they reach out to you if you believe that they may be upset. You have to let it go and don’t associate with those types of people but you can definitely forgive them.
Ralph Zuranski: Do you experience service to others as a source of joy?
Mike Filsaime: Yes. It’s not about the money. Money is a byproduct of doing good things. If you can create good products and good services then that’s what life is all about.
It’s about good products and good services. What your doing In Search of Heroes, is a good service. I definitely believe in putting a good service out there and everything else you want in life will come.
Ralph Zuranski: When was the lowest point in your life and how did you change your life path to one of victory over the obstacles you were facing at that time?
Mike Filsaime: I’ve been fortunate Ralph that I haven’t had, knock wood of course, and I will (Knock, knock), any deaths in my immediate family. My parents got divorced when I was in my mid-twenties so that didn’t affect me the way it could have.
Maybe it would have affected someone who was 8 years old. I lost my grandfather. We knew each other but we didn’t know each other well. So “knock wood” again there hasn’t been any type of tragedy or anything like that.
However, I had financial tragedy and stress back in 1998. I was in the car business. I left the car business for 6 months to get involved with a real estate investor who turned out to be nothing more than a con man. He took me and about six other people in on this con. It was a con by driving a Mercedes and having a house that wasn’t his and all these other things that we believed were his.
His intentions were good. His intentions were to use our credit and our money to buy houses and repair them and flip them. What ended up happening, remember what we said about taking on too many projects, he was trying to buy too many houses at a time.
While he was trying to put all this construction in and collecting the mortgage payments and when the cash flow went negative he started keeping the mortgage payments and putting it in his own pocket.
Several months later we found out that the whole project went bankrupt. Since it was our credit and our money he lost nothing. We had him arrested and we filed charges and put all that stuff behind us.
What it left me in 1998 was $70,000 in debt and 3 foreclosures and 3 repossessions. One was for a Mercedes Benz and one for a Ford Exhibition and a Harley Davidson. I had signed for all these things for him under the business name.
Also the credit card machine and three foreclosures were in my name so I had no choice at that time but to file bankruptcy. They were coming after everything I owned. If you look at all these successful people out there like Stephen Pierce, Mark Victor Hansen, Armand Moran and Joe Vitalie there’s one thing you can be comfortable in knowing.
The school of hard knocks happens to all of us. So we must stop with the self-pity. Everybody’s got their own story. I heard recently that everybody is going to tell you “My parents left me when I was three years old and I was put up for adoption.” Ok, well so what, everybody’s got a story.
Let it go. Stop holding on to it and let that be an inspiration to people when you’ve overcome it. Start thinking positive and stop dwelling on it on that. Eighty-five percent of the people in the US have grown up in a dysfunctional family.
You are not alone. So stop thinking about that you were given these bad things. I think that 9 out of 10 successful people that are multi-millionaires in this world have gone through major tragedies or bankruptcy or financial tragedy.
It’s ok to let those things happen. You can’t be embarrassed and say “Oh I don’t want anybody to know that I went bankrupt.” Hey, it happens. We’ve made mistakes in our life. We have to learn from them and move on.
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