"Part Four: Ray Edwards In Search Of Heroes Interview Was Awesome" by Ralph Zuranski
Ray Edwards In Search Of Heroes Interview
Ralph Zuranski: What principles are you willing to sacrifice your life for? I know a lot of people talk about running into a burning building or pulling somebody out of the top of a car. What is your perspective on sacrificing your life?
Ray Edwards: Well, it’s an interesting question, Ralph, because I know what in principle I would say. I always wonder what I would do if I was really faced with a choice. I think we all like to imagine ourselves as the hero of the story in the movies.
I am the guy sitting in the movie theatre watching the hero thinking, “Would I do that?” I would like to think that I would, but would I really? There are some things that I know that I would readily sacrifice my life for without a moments hesitation and those are people. Those are the people that I love, my family, my wife, my son, my mother, my brothers, my friends.
A very influential person in my life and one of my heroes is a man most of us know as Jesus Christ. He said, “Greater love hath no man than to lay down his life for a friend.” I believe that to be true.
It’s interesting that we build up castles in our mind about what we think is important. Sometimes the simplest things will clarify them. There is a gentleman for whom I have a lot of respect named Steven Pierce. He talks about how people make decisions about what they are willing to do and what they are willing to take action for without thinking.
He gives an example. He says if you were sitting on your front porch and your little girl was playing out in the street and you looked up the hill and noticed that a car had popped out of gear and was rolling down the hill toward your little girl what would you do?
The answer, of course, is that you would immediately spring from your porch, run across the yard, run across the street and grab your little girl and pull her out of harm’s way. You wouldn’t think about all of the obstacles.
I would have to jump off the porch and I might break my leg. I will have to jump over that fire hydrant, and I have to go around that car. What if that dog next door chases me and bites my ankle?
You wouldn’t think about any of that stuff. You would just instinctively jump into action. I think that is because deep inside of us we all know clearly what the important things are. Sometimes it is those kinds of stark situations that bring that to light.
Ralph Zuranski: Right. Steven is one of the heroes that I interviewed. He really actually has sort of a heroic life. We learned about what was the lowest point in his life.
Ray Edwards: He certainly does.
Ralph Zuranski: He goes through and shares that with power and conviction and it’s pretty astounding. What is the lowest point in your life and how did you change your life and win a victory over all obstacles?
Ray Edwards: Oh boy! The lowest point in my life was probably, not probably, it definitely was right after I graduated from high school because my parents had divorced at this time. It was not the most pleasant of divorces. I was really on my own even before graduating from high school. Really at about the age of 16, I was left to my own devices.
I had grown up thinking that I was going to live the dream of the American middle class. I was going to go to college and it would be paid for. And I would be able to party and have a great time like everybody who goes to college does and then go out and get a job and start my quote ‘real middle class life’.
Of course, God has a way of sometimes having another plan that we didn’t anticipate. In fact, I think that someone once said that if you want to make God laugh, just tell him what your plans are. I was on my own. I was working at a radio station. I started working in the radio business when I was 14 years old.
I had some money and was able to find a place to live and so forth, but I was really lost in a lot of ways. I had fallen away from my faith in God and the things that had carried me through thus far. I didn’t have a whole lot of money and I was definitely enjoying partying and having a good time.
I came to a point where I realized, “Boy, this is not the life that I was destined to have.” I just felt that there was something more for me and that I wasn’t living up to the potential that I had been given. Slowly I began to put the pieces back together.
Most of the credit for that goes to my wife whom I met at a young age. We met when I was 18 years old and we married shortly there after. I am fond of telling people that it has worked out for 21 years, so we think it is probably going to be okay. We think the marriage is probably going to work.
She has been a tremendous inspiration to me in my life and helped me live up to my potential. It was a struggle for a lot of years monetarily, but I moved to a bigger city and got a better job in the radio business. I began to climb the ranks in that business.
It’s interesting, Ralph, something that I have found. I certainly don’t set myself up as some kind of paragon of virtue because I’m far from it, but I know this. The closer I stay to my principles, the closer I stay to the things that I know are right and true, the more I am rewarded.
That may be financially sometimes, but it can also be spiritually in the amount of peace that a person has in their life. It can also be in the amount of good that you can do in the lives of others. There really is no greater reward than to know that you made a positive difference in someone’s life.
I know that sounds Pollyannaish. I will share an experience that I had a couple of nights ago. Again, please, I hope that nobody listens to this and thinks, “Wow, Ray is really full of himself and thinks he is such a great guy.” Trust me, I know me and I’ve got lots of room for improvement.
Ralph Zuranski: Don’t we all?
Ray Edwards: I just had this principle of how it is built into us to want to help other people and to feel good when we know we have. It was a simple thing. I bought some take out food from a Chinese restaurant, and I went into the restaurant to pick it up. The young lady gave me my order and I was paying.
I don’t know if you really tip in this situation. Really, all she did was bring out the bag from the kitchen to the cash register and she rang me up. I’m going to take it home so there isn’t really any service but I thought, “I don’t know if it is right or wrong but I’m going to leave a tip.”
I’m a pretty generous tipper and that’s because of my wife too. I definitely was not a generous tipper until meeting my wife. She had a chance to work as a server in a restaurant during her college years and informed me that those folks work hard so you need to tip them.
So, I tip 20% always. Not only do I think it is the right thing to do, but I think the math is easy to do.
I left this lady a 20% tip and as I was turning to leave she stopped me and she said, “You have no idea what this means to me.” I turned and looked back and she had tears coming from her eyes over a tip at a restaurant. She said, “Thank you,” and I said, “You’re welcome.”
As I left I saw that she went running to the back of the store and she was jumping up and down showing the other servers. It’s not that I think that was such a great thing that I did. My point is that you never know what things you can do, what small things you might be able to do that might mean so much to other people.
Ralph Zuranski: Are you talking about random acts of kindness?
Ray Edwards: Well, I guess I am. I don’t know that I would have called it that but yes. I think that is exactly it. You just never know.
Leaving that tip honestly was not a big deal for me. I don’t think that was such a big thing but obviously it meant a lot more than that to the recipient.